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FUNNY ANECDOTES IN DOCTOR’s OFFICE

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Funniest Incidents at The Doctor’s Office

“Here,” says the nurse, handing the patient a urine specimen container. “The bathroom’s over there.” A few minutes later, the patient comes out of the bathroom.

“Thanks,” he says, returning the empty container. “But there was a toilet in there, so I didn’t need this after all.” —Travis Stork, MD, Nashville, Tennessee

Overheard in the Doctor’s Office

As I leaned in to check her eyes, my older patient got a little frisky. “You remind me of my third husband,” she said coyly.

“Third husband?” I asked. “How many have you had?”

“Two.” —Leon Pendracky, OD, Avella, Pennsylvania

My patient announced she had good news … and bad. “The medicine for my earache worked,” she said. “What’s the bad news?” I asked.

“It tasted awful.”

Since she was feeling better, I didn’t have the heart to tell her they’re called eardrops for a reason. —Murray Grossan, MD, founder of the Grossan Institute, Los Angeles

Patient: Doctor, I slipped in the grocery store and really hurt myself.

Me: Where did you get hurt?

Patient: Aisle six. —John Munshower, DO, Media, Pennsylvania

I gave my patient the results of her sleep study: “It looks like you stopped breathing in your sleep over 65 times per hour.”

Her response: “Did I start back?” —Michael Breus, PhD, Scottsdale, Arizona

During surgery, my fellow resident bumped heads with the surgeon.

“Ah, Dr. Jones, a meeting of the minds,” he said, laughing it off.

The surgeon mumbled, “Yes. And I felt so alone.” —Sid Schwab, MD, Everett, Washington

Scene: The operating room. I’m reviewing the surgical checklist with the nurses.

Me: We have the surgical equipment, the heart-lung machine, antibiotics, and the replacement heart valve on hand.

Patient: You wait until now to figure this stuff out? Marc Gillinov, MD, The Cleveland Clinic

I prescribed an inhaler for a patient’s cat allergy. He came back a week later saying he was none the better. Turns out, he was spraying the inhaler on the cat. —Source: sunnyskyz.com

4 Medical Excuses For Missing Work (People Actually Thought Might Fly)

“My child stuck a mint up my nose, and I had to go to the emergency room to have it removed.”

“I got sick from reading too much.”

Employee got stuck in the blood pressure machine at the grocery store and couldn’t get out.

“My dog wasn’t feeling well, so I tasted his food, and then I got sick.”

—Sources: careerbuilder.com;blog.oregonlive.com

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Author: txnaturalpediatrics

By training, I am a American Board Certified Pediatrician. But in my younger years I grew up with natural alternatives. As a mom I have tried to incorporate both for my kids and it has worked wonders. And finally, as I am studying natural & alternative medicines, I realize the beauty and wisdom of living closer to earth. Hence in my practice I integrate both...for acute ailments I follow American Academy of Pediatrics recommendation but for simple and/or chronic conditions I prefer natural alternatives. In western training we were raised to think that "health is the absence of symptoms and problems". But eastern sensibilities has educated me that "Health is state that allows one to use the full capabilities of their body, mind and intellect. Therefore, healthy living is a balanced state of well being: physically, mentally, socially and spiritually." This implies that healing is not a "one-pill-fits-all", but a personalized experience.

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