A beautiful article shared by Ravi.
How can I be happy?Happiness exists in your mind rather than in materialistic possession.
Happiness does not come from a state, but from a change of state.
Matthew Manning
Here’s how:
1. Stop comparing yourself to other people. I work in psychiatry and can tell you first-hand that so many seemingly happy and successful people are burning themselves alive on the fire of their inner turmoil. Focus on you.
2. Socialize. Even if you are an introvert, force yourself into social scenarios that give you the opportunity to meet people and form connections. These connections will put you back in touch with your humanity.
3. Make healthy decisions. It is amazing how much exercise and good diet can change your outlook on the world around you. The negative thoughts in your head that seem so very real and pressing will melt away.
4. Do something different. Stop wasting your time trying to find the “perfect hobby.” Pick anything – whether it’s fiber art or coffee tasting. Find something that you can put effort into, build competence, and see results.
5. Get in touch with your anchors. We tend to lose these anchors as we get older. Try to better position yourself within any communities you once found a home in, whether that’s your family, your neighborhood, your culture, or your religion.
6. Look less ahead. Look less behind. Try to refocus yourself to the current moment more often. Start building memories instead of living in them. Start creating your future instead of just hoping for a better one. If you don’t do this, your life will become a fog that can stretch across your entire time on earth.
7. Create. Write in a journal. Paint something. Make up a song even if you will never perform it. Start to fashion the relics that you will leave behind when you are gone.
8. Let go. Forgive those who hurt you. I’m sorry you were hurt. But if you do not leave that hurt in the past, it will follow you like a wolf – forever casting a dangerous shadow over everything you do.
9. Worry more about the others. Many times it is our own narcissism that destroys us. It seems counter-intuitive, but take some time each day to think about the needs of the other people in your life. Helping them meet those needs will make you happier in a way that you might not understand right now.
10. Stop running. There is no such place as “away.” Travel as far as you want, but you will still find yourself waiting for you when you get there. Pull out your sword. It’s time to turn around and fight the dragons inside you. You are mightier than them.
Simple and easy first steps
1. Be grateful for what you have. As others have said, people often drive hard and forget to be thankful for what they have right now. We are absurdly fortunate as a modern society. As comedian Louis CK said “people who complain about their cell phone coverage are crazy. Shut up! It’s magic! Enjoy it!”
2. Let go of the past but strive to learn from it. You can’t change things in the past. If you keep agonizing over things you can’t change, it’s wasted effort. You’ll just be looping negative emotions, which totally makes you feel worse…100% of the time you do it.
3. Volunteer. It’s crazy how good this makes people feel. Really. It’s amazing. Cats, homeless, whatever, just give of yourself. It really helps
4. Smile. Try it. Just smile right now. You’ll instantly feel better. Force yourself to smile more. This is cool because there’s real data backing this up, it’s not just a touchy/ feely philosophy.
5. Slow down.
6. Socialize. Even introverts need relationships. Take a class (improve and archery have worked for me) or force yourself to talk to that cute guy/girl. You might be rejected but sooner than later, you’ll be ok with even that.
7. Get outside. When the movie Avatar came out, people were complaining they wished they lived in a beautiful world like that. We do. Go for a day drive. Hike and force yourself to watch a spider spinning a web. Or just breathe and enjoy the sun.
8. Breathe slowly, often. It slows the blood, it soothes the pressure, it calms the nerves.
